Author Archives: NOFXmike

Glimpses of Munich #4: Flaschenöffner

When I started this project I had no intention of sticking to historical places, but rather to try and keep it random.  Keeping that in mind, I present the Flaschenöffner.

Tourists are always looking for the best place to drink when in Munich and I can tell you with great certainty that it is probably the Hofbräuhaus or Augustiner Keller that you should be visiting.  The problem in saying that is midnight will come around and you will be looking for “just another beer.”  There are several options at this point, but sadly this too shall pass.  At three in the morning you find yourself either calling it a night or searching for a rare bar that is still open and will serve you in the state that you find yourself in at this hour.  It is at this point where I would recommend stumbling your way to the Flaschenöffner for another few CREW Republic beers.  When they throw you out it’s 5am…so go watch the sun come up on the banks of the Isar.  Don’t forget to grab a beer for the road, after all it IS the bottle opener.

The Flaschenöffner is only a five minute walk from the Marienplatz or a short U-bahn (U1 or U2 to Fraunhoferstrasse) ride if it is still running at that point.  There also happens to be a tram stop right there (tram 18 or N27).  Anyways, the address is:  Fraunhoferstraße 37

 

Glimpses of Munich #5: Backstage

In order to fully experience any city one must take a look at its nightlife.   Although Munich has many clubs of various sorts, Munich’s Backstage is probably the best of its live music venues.  Founded in 1991 and having moved a few times, it remains a constant hot spot for good cheap beer and top punk, metal, hip hop, reggae, alternative, rock, electronic, and independent music from all over the world.

The reason I like to draw attention to the Backstage rather than other music venues such as the Feierwerk, Zenith, Tonhalle, Strom, or Optimolwerke is simple:  it is easy to get to, has an atmosphere like no other, and is extremely consistent.

The Backstage is multiple venues in one:  a small outdoor stage in the summer, a small two level room called the club, a medium sized venue called the hall, and the largest venue they call the werk.

Every summer the Backstage has a series of concerts known as the “free & easy festival.”  Although titled as a festival, it really is just a series of normal concerts which are completely free and absolutely ideal for the casual fan or non-committal friend.  2018’s lineup includes The Mahones, Helmet, Hatebreed, and Municipal Waste.

A map, as well as S-bahn, tram, and bus directions can be found here.

Glimpses of Munich #3: body parts

Pope Eleutherius’s skull

When my kind of people think of sightseeing in Europe, one of the first things on their minds is checking out all of the dead people on display.  In Munich, there is a full skeleton just off of Marienplatz, but today I want to point out the largest collection of random bones from corpses of possible saints in Bavaria.

In 1557 Pope Paul IV gave Duke Wilhelm V of Bavaria permission to start collecting relics.  Wilhelm is well known today in Munich for founding the Hofbräu brewery, building St. Michael’s church, founding the Old Schleissheim Palace, forcing all protestants out of the country, bankrupting the state,  and eventually abdicating.  I guess I should also mention that his wedding is at the center of the glockenspiel, which is that thing that goes on at Marienplatz that you could just watch on youtube (don’t, it should be watched in person) if you want.  Wilhelm V’s son, Elector Maximilian I, expanded the collection to what we see today.

The collection of relics is kept in a room half way through a tour of the Residenz in downtown Munich.  It is a vaulted chamber with sixty display cases of mostly small bones that were originally displayed in the Reiche Kapelle, which is also in Munich’s Residenz.  However, the best part is probably having a glimpse at Saint John the Baptist’s 4th skull.  That’s right, according to the Catholic Church he had four heads, or there was a horrible trade in fake relics for a few hundred years, one or the other. 

Before you go:  As mentioned, the reliquaries are located inside the Residenz museum which is a sprawling palace in downtown Munich.  The entrance is just off of Max-Joseph-platz and the entry fee as of 2018 is €7 for the entire museum.  You can check out the map here.  Audio guides are free with paid entrance.  Expect to spend two hours or more in the museum.

On a side note:  if bones don’t do it for you, have a look at the preserved organs over in Altötting.  The hearts of the Wittelsbachs are on display daily in the Gnadenkapelle and the body of Count Johann Tilly of the thirty years war fame is in the crypt of the Stiftspfarrkirche St. Philipp und Jakob immediately next door.  Don’t worry, I’ll have more disturbing posts later in the year.

Glimpses of Munich #2: Blood Castle

Blutenburg, directly translated to blood castle, sounds like an awesome name for a medieval castle, doesn’t it? (unfortunately it is now called Schloss Blutenburg, so its name is now “palace blood castle,” which isn’t quite as fun)

This medieval castle was built between 1438 and 1501 for Duke Albrecht III and his son Duke Sigismund. As with most castles in the area, it was neglected at some point, in this case during the 30 years war, and later restored.  Restoration took place in the late 17th century and unfortunately they did not bother to restore its full defenses and therefore some of its castle character.  Still, it retains the castle structure and definitely looks beautiful in its little park.  I would go so far as to say it is the only “real” castle left in the city limits of Munich.  (both the Alter Hof and the Residenz at one point were castles, but they’ve been modified so many times that you can’t see it any longer)

What I love about this castle is its appearance and its slightly hidden location.  Most tourists will never see it, which makes it a little more fun for those that do.

Getting there as a tourist is a BIT more difficult than pretty much anything in your guide books, but these days you just download your MVV app and away you go…

Map

Unfortunately for places like this I don’t have great pictures that I’ve taken myself.  Below is an open source picture, but you can find many more on google.

Glimpses of Munich #1

I love Munich.  I lived there for ten years…my wife is from Munich, my son is from Munich…and well, I spent many hundreds of hours walking its streets in some sort of a weird “Lost in Translation” sort of thing.  Anyway, friends of ours are going to visit Munich this year and one of my first thoughts was that they are odd tourists who might want to see and do things that the average tourist probably would never stumble into.

SO, that being said, I’m going to start posting somewhat random places that I think are interesting in Munich.  Some might be interesting to you, some might not…we’ll see.

Oh, what about the picture at the top?  That has nothing to do with this post as it’s 2 hours South-West of Munich and you know all about it anyway…but it got your attention.

Anyway, below is my first one.  This is a statue that most tourists don’t see because of its location…except maybe during the Oktoberfest.  Holy Roman Emperor Ludwig IV “The Bavarian” used to get quite a lot of attention on some of my tours, but unfortunately all I could show tourists, as far as statues of the man himself, was a dismal one outside of his former castle, The Alter Hof (map).

It’s probably not worth your while to find it if you’re in town for a few days, but…you know, if you’re wandering around town like me…

Map

Denkmal Kaiser-Ludwig

This guy only gets a look from random Oktoberfest visitors…you can find him at Kaiser-Ludwig-Platz 8

Project rediscover the Midwest.

I have recently moved back to Minnesota.  I know many (including myself sometimes) never thought I would move back (it was 10 years), but I have moved…and it’s been interesting.

Why the move?  Many reasons, but at the end of the day it’s what my wife and I decided long ago and we’re giving it the old college try.  Is it permanent?  Who knows.

What am I going to do with this site?  Hopefully be more active again and become entrenched in Minnesota tourism.  I really do love to travel and I don’t think moving to Minnesota will change anything other than flight possibilities.

So far this year we’ve done a fair amount of new touristy things in the area, but from this point on I’ll hopefully post about them here.

I call it project rediscover the Midwest as that’s what this is: a rediscovering.  Many of the places and things I plan to see and do I have seen and done before, but in what seems like a lifetime ago in a weird dream.  This time I’m showing my wife and child the intricacies of my culture while at the same time checking out things I’ve wanted to do since I can remember.  Also, thanks to the internet, I now know of options I never knew existed…making the list of options almost endless.  Project rediscover the Midwest will take years, but it should be fun and you’re welcome to join us…if you have ideas, post’em!

Radius started a blog

Radius Tours, the main tour company I’ve worked with since 2005, is having its 25th anniversary this month!  It’s time to party while trying to conduct tours…

Anyways, the company has started its own blog which you can find here:  http://radiustours.wordpress.com/

Please like, share, and take a few tours if you’re in town 🙂

Innsbruck

So last weekend we spent in Innsbruck, a beautiful lesser regional capital with a very cool club if you enjoy live music (the pmk). Apparently I’m the mayor of it on foursquare at the moment.  So anyways…

Last year we were there a few times…twice for sight-seeing and once for a concert. Although it is possible to do Innsbruck (sight-seeing) in a day from Munich…either you won’t see much at all or you’ll be completely exhausted from running around all day…leave EARLY and come back late (early is more important as museums, castles, palaces, and churches close by sun down or earlier).
I recommend 2-3 days, quite similar to Salzburg…though Salzburg is much prettier…

Innsbruck Christmas market

 

I enjoy being in Innsbruck…but I certainly wouldn’t want to work there as a tour guide…

So yeah…things you should not miss:

The cenotaph of Max I (it’s in a church, across from the palace, gotta pay to enter, but it’s well worth it)….castle Ambras….and the museum of the golden roof…the imperial palace is nice as well, but we’ve got much better in Munich 🙂

Want a more impressive run-down on what is in Innsbruck and my opinions of each?  ask in the comments or e-mail me!  (I just don’t want to write a novel if no one cares 🙂 )

 

Beer Tours in Munich

As many of you know, I used to do the Radius “Bavarian beer and food tour.”  Last night I went on the tour with a group of fellow guides & Radius employees as well as a few tourists.  I rarely go on tours from other guides…just as most guides rarely go on mine.  It’s usually very annoying to me so I sneak away from the group and try not to listen to the guide.  There are many reasons for this…

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Anyways, so last night I went with the group to the Beer and Oktoberfest Museum (which is great), had a few beers there & then went on to eat at the Hofbräu Keller (which is a highly recommended restaurant for good reason), and then we ended up at the infamous Hofbräuhaus.  Well, okay, to be fair we continued after that…but not with the full group.

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This is actually a fairly typical night out, partly because so many of the places in Munich close by 11 or 12.  So then you have to hunt for a smaller hole in the wall that will let you drink for another hour or two.

Several companies these days to pub crawls, but when we created the Bavarian Beer and Food Tour we were the first to focus on the actual TOUR…the beer and its role in Bavarian culture.  Depending on the group as well as the guide, however, in practice the tour can make many detours and digress very quickly into a drink-a-thon pub crawl with food thrown in for the hell of it.  Half truths filling in for reality and accepted because of either pandering to nationalism or an emphasis on entertainment rather than correctness.

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I think it may be impossible to do a proper beer tour day after day without this variance though.  That may be a big part of why I don’t do the tour any longer.  At least not for random groups.

I love beer.  I love Bavarian culture.  I love Munich.  *sigh* oh well.

Want a private beer tour?  €220 + the price of the beers and I can make it happen.  Please enquire at least three weeks in advance of the proposed tour date. Cheaper if you don’t mind me drinking soda while you’re drinking beer, that way I can work the next day.

Beer?

Oh, the weather outside is frightful…

Really, it’s not good.  Snow has been falling the last couple of days and although it hasn’t amounted to hardly anything (it’s pretty much all gone), it makes a tour guide’s life hell.  It’s just cold and wet…that’s no fun.

Wednesday I had a Neuschwanstein tour…it mostly drizzled and you couldn’t see anything.  The tour group were all happy at the end of the tour, but it really is hard to make someone actually HAPPY when you can’t show them anything.  The good part is for those moments that you CAN see the building from further than 20 feet away, there is no longer any scaffolding covering it! 

I keep having Spanish people on my tours…yet they say they have 25% unemployment.  Rather odd.

Supposedly they have a special glühbier this year at the Christmas market…gonna have to try it soon.  Tomorrow we’re going to Die Toten Hosen…it’s been years since I’ve seen them…

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Christmas time in Munich

As with every year the tour numbers have taken a nose dive for a few weeks, but now that the Christmas markets are up and running I expect my next few tours to be busy.  Along with the Christmas markets, we should have REALLY horrible weather later this week.  I’ll be down at Neuschwanstein tomorrow and it should be raining with a high of 40F.  The problem with this is that will probably be the forecast for every day until March…possibly April.  I hope I’m wrong.

I’ve gotten a few e-mails over the last few months wanting very specific/odd private tours.  I usually don’t do them if they’re hard to get to by public transportation because, well, although I have a driver’s license…I don’t have a commercial driver’s license.  Also, I really do want to feel like I’m actually doing you a service when I give a tour, not just bringing you places.  I know, most of my colleagues would just tell me to take the tour and pocket the money and who cares….well, the problem is that I do.  Glühwein sounds good about now…

Fridays mean nothing to a tour guide

It’s black friday, but I don’t have time to shop. At the moment I’m on a train out toward where I used to live. This is a test to see how this app for my phone works with wordpress…so far so good.
Speaking of where I used to live, Seefeld, there’s a massive 14th century castle there that may be well worth a visit on your way to Andechs monastery…well, that is if you like Egyptian stuff.

Happy Thanksgiving, I’ll be at KFC if you need me

However, I won’t be at KFC very long.  My wife and I will be hurrying in order to get to a concert of a French band, Uncommonmenfrommars.  Technically, I believe 3 of the 4 members have American passports as well as French…so you could say I’m celebrating Thanksgiving with other Americans…er, so.

Anyways, Thanksgiving has always been a weird time of year to be an expat.  These days all the relatives chime in via Skype, but it’s certainly not the same experience.  I was serious when in the headline I wrote that we’re going to KFC…because, well, that’s as close as I’m going to get to a thanksgiving meal on a Thursday which is also a work day…and unlike Germans and most American expats, I don’t just move holidays.

I also just wanted to mention my friend’s blog, @ http://freshbreadripenedcheeseandabottleofwhine.wordpress.com/ …he’s an American expat as well, but not a tour guide.  He teaches English and American culture…and watches a heck of a lot of American football, which is what I get to avoid by being here instead of with my family in Minnesota. 

Happy Thanksgiving, hope everyone has a wonderful day…

Top 10 Christmas Markets near Munich

In about a week, Germany is going to be completely covered in middle aged tourists seeking the best of the Christmas markets.  I have been to a couple dozen throughout the region many, many times…and here are my top choices for Christmas markets within three hours of Munich:

 

  1. Augsburg  – This is my favorite Christmas market not because of the city itself being the most historically interesting city in Southern Germany, but because it is a beautiful Christmas market, has its own unique “Christmas show” at the Rathaus (daily I believe?), is one of the larger markets, and does not have the crushing crowds of Munich, Salzburg, and Nuremberg.
  2. Nuremberg – The largest and most famous of the bunch, it can be ridiculously busy in the evening.  Then again, to truly see it…you HAVE to be there in the evening…during the day just will not do.  So…good luck.
  3. Landshut – Landshut is a beautiful town closer to Munich’s airport than Munich itself.  The Christmas market there is on the main pedestrian only street which is lined with historic houses and a charming atmosphere that the big cities just cannot attain.
  4. Munich’s main market (at Marienplatz) – It’s busy, it’s not centralized, but it does have everything that all the others have…and the New Town Hall works really wonderfully for Christmas photo backgrounds…
  5. Würzburg – With it’s large market square, this medium sized city has  what makes for a much nicer market than most larger towns in the region.  (the problem with Würzburg is it’s location, see #7)
  6. Innsbruck – Innsbruck has several Christmas markets thoughout its historic old town.  Certainly not the largest nor most beautiful Christmas market; it is quite charming.
  7. Rothenburg – Cutey-small Christmas market in a beautifully well preserved walled city.  What more do you want?  (the problem is that it’s 3+ hours from Munich each way…so I’d recommend an overnight stay, possibly in nearby Würzburg)
  8. Munich’s Tollwood Festival (at the Oktoberfest grounds) – It’s more of a high-end hippie fest than a Christmas market, but it still has its charms…and much of it is in door, which is quite welcome if you’re touring Christmas markets!
  9. Regensburg – A smaller Christmas market in this ancient river town, in my opinion vastly over-rated.  Skip-able…
  10. Salzburg -  If you could delete 75% of the people, this would be a wonderful Christmas market…but be warned:  I refuse to do tours to Salzburg during the Christmas market for a reason.  The crushing crowds, even at noon, are too much for all but the most hardcore of angry people.

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Augsburg’s Christmas Market

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Munich’s main Christmas market (taken just a 1 min walk south of Marienplatz)

How to plan that perfect vacation in Europe

Everyone’s idea of the perfect trip is different.  I saw that a popular travel blogger recently told people that they can see the world for far cheaper than they imagined and he’ll tell you how:  stay at hostels in the middle of no where in 3rd world countries…and walk there.  (ok, fine, I added the walk there part)

My point is that travel is expensive and I don’t have a magical way of seeing everything for free.  I myself am ridiculously frugal, though, and if I am advising you on your travel plans you can be assured that I am taking that into account.  At the same time, you want to see everything since you will probably not be back.  I like to see EVERYTHING myself and am quite annoyed that every guidebook is incomplete…

Nearly all of my vacations in Europe are sight seeing at ancient monuments, churches, palaces, castles, and such.  Many of these are in major cities or able to be done as a day trip from a major city.  So what do I recommend?  Guide books? wikipedia? Google?  local tourist boards?

Well, I recommend reading everything.   I know, you don’t have time.  Well, you have found me and I have very likely been to the place you want to go.

So the best way, in my opinion, to plan your vacation to a major city in Europe?  Have an expert, like me, do the planning for you.

When I take a trip I read through a couple guide books on the place in question from cover to cover.  Then, I Google everything while checking out their wikipedia sites as well as their official websites.  In the end I come up with an excel spreadsheet with all of the basic information on the places, expected prices, opening times, days they are closed, if they are covered by some kind of pass, and oftentimes notes on when is the best time to be there.  For the ones I do for myself I don’t have to be as thorough as if I were doing it for someone else since I only need an outline really, not the full speech…if ya know what I’m saying.

Anyways, I plan to post a few old spreadsheets of mine on here at some point to help others out, but if anyone would like me to do one for you…I can be bought.  Especially if you’re planning months in advance, it should be no problem for me to make up a spreadsheet for you along with a few extended notes.  You can pay me via paypal if you want after the spreadsheet is received.  cost?  let me know in a comment or e-mail what you’d want to pay for this service…and I’ll at least consider any offer.

Thoughts anyone?

Maybe I’ll do one for Munich….

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One last thing: anyone know where this picture was taken?  Hint:  not in Munich.

Winter is here…ish.

It has already snowed this year, so I declare it winter.  By that I mean that I’ll be quite miserable until May…ish.

As I’ve said many times before, Munich doesn’t REALLY get winter.  However, it does get miserable…and that’s bad enough for me.  What I mean by miserable is that for the next several months highs will be in the 30’s or 40’s and lows will be in the 20’s or 30’s.  Lots of rain with the occasional snow…and very rarely a hint of sun.  This is not the sunny but freezing cold winter of Minnesota…this is worse.

Now on to happier things:  Munich’s Christmas market is coming soon.  The reason I say this is that the Christmas tree in front of the New Town Hall is already up!  In the states this would be blasphemous before Thanksgiving…but since there is no thanksgiving here, Christmas is thrust upon them even earlier than back home!

The Christmas markets are quite lovely to take a stroll through and they also mean one of my favorite German beverages are available everywhere:  Glühwein.  (mulled wine)  So we can happily get drunk on the streets and pretend that it’s sunny!

It also brings some of my favorite tourists, truth be told, in the type that remind me of my parents.  Backpackers are not my thing…

Anyways, I’ll be (once again) trying to update my blog more often…and who knows, maybe I’ll keep it up for quite some time now that Nileguide isn’t going any more.

More hot adult beverages for everyone, enjoy 🙂

 

The Oktoberfest is going…and I haven’t had a beer there yet this year

I know, it sounds crazy…but I’ve just been too busy. Petra and I went the other day for lunch and a wander around the grounds (there are certain things we need to do there every year…). Anyways, I’ll be there to drink on Sunday…I’m considering Friday or Saturday.